this is a day without Strattera

and already i'm feeling the pull of the interwebz to look at all kitty and doggy sites.  And to look at all the vimeos.  And the entertainment news.  And the web cam from the Eiffel Tower in Paris.  And the bay in Kona. 

My pharmacy was OUT of the strattera.  So i am on my own for today.  i do not think this is going to go well. 

Fingers crossed that i am wrong.

well, so much for that fingers-crossed thing.  I have been all over the interwebz.  Crap. 

wow - what a difference without Strattera makes

i forgot (hello) the bottle in Mr. Oliver's diaper bag yesterday, so i was unable to take a dose this morning; and i cannot do the guided meditation that i do every morning; damn screaming monkeys!  I take the breath in -- thoughts thoughts thoughts -- i let the breath out -- thoughts thoughts thoughts. 

Ultimate proof about that medication working.  I actually gave up about a minute into it; there was no point in continuing on; the screaming monkeys would have progressed to throwing their poo at some point. 

Luckily, my wonderful son-in-law, Tim, is bringing my pills AND my service baby, Sweet Baby boy edition, Mr. Oliver for lunch.  I can't wait to nom onto that pill! 

deepak chopra in the morning

my new morning routine at work is to do a guided meditation with deepak chopra; see below.  I am now able to do this because those screaming monkeys have quieted down nicely.  I breath in, i breath out.  I think "peace" on the in and "ful" on the out.  I visualize Hawaii while doing it.  I sit quietly, hands in lap, sitting straight as if there were a string from the top of my head to heaven.  and this is the spectacular thing .. The time goes by like nothing; the youtube is almost 5 minutes and it doesn't feel that way.  Pre-Straterra, while trying to meditate, time did not just move slowly, it seemed not to move at all.   

I think this new development is pretty amazing.

ADD and egg mcmuffins

this is a FIRST; i'm not kidding, this is BIG, folks, BIG.

 a couple of times a week, i go to McD's to get a latte (cheapest in town) and an egg mcmuffin.  and that egg mcmuffin is done GONE before i've driven 2 blocks; my impulse to eat that thing immediately  is so overwhelming; so much McD goodness.  today, my second day being on maximal medical therapy, that thing stayed in its wrapper in its bag until i was at work; i had no compulsion to eat it straight away.  this is new for me -- a pleasure deferred.  i've never believed in a pleasure deferred; a concept unknown to me, for sure.

gold star for me!

up to 60 mg --

Today's the first day of the maximal dose.  i'm feeling .....  better?  Let's see, i'm feeling less jangled in my head; it's absolutely nothing dramatic, just a subtle shift of something in my brain that is allowing me to get going when i first come into work.  But this is the first day of the 60 (from 40) mg.  I'm actually interested to see what that difference is like. 

Better living through chemistry - me and Dow Chemical. 

And here's the OTHER service baby, male edition -- Oliver and I are good buddies; it is such a great thing, a blessing, to have a person, even if it's a baby, who is a pure and uncomplicated good thing in your life.  And he is. 

how many people do you know who smile about 90% of the time?

I don't know which column to put friday's events

* Woke up friday morning, feeling pretty focused, pretty excited by the day to make incentive --
* I rear-ended a van by letting my foot slip off the brake onto the gas --

All in all, i think it goes into the not-good column.  I am trying very hard not to take this it-could-happen-to-anybody accident personally.  I had no babies in the car, nobody got hurt, it'll get fixed, etc.  AND, ahem, cough, cough, the officer (thank you SPD) did not cite me for expired tabs which i will get around to on tuesday. 

My son came, in the rain, to duct tape my bumper to the rest of the car, and then later in the night, he brought my grand-baby, Miss Chelsea, by for a service visit -- i love service babies!  My grand-baby, Mister Oliver, is also an amazing service baby. 

And when i came to work this morning, i did a (you-tube) guided meditation with Deepak Chopra, whose voice i love, and my screaming-monkey mind sat quietly and enjoyed it, which is a first! 

The earth still spins no matter what is happening to us, it would seem. 
Miss Chelsea -- Service Baby, Sweet Baby Girl edition

First post -- second week on Strattera...

I'm starting my second week on Strattera .. 

Let me introduce myself.  My name is Christine and I'm almost 58 years old.  After watching a TV show on PBS about adult ADHD/ADD, I had to admit that their stories were not similar, but EXACTLY like my own. 

* My elementary school years were pretty much spent sitting on a chair out in the hallway to stop me from disrupting the place -- became good friends with the janitor who would bring me hot tea when we moved to portables -- still on the chair out in the cold. 

* I have attended 6 (six) community colleges in my attempt to finish my bachelor's.  I hope to finish a master's sometime in my NEXT life. 

* I start many things, finish nothing; this past Christmas, I started 5 scarves and finished only one of them -- on December 27th. 

Well, that's a start.  Long-story-short, i have started Straterra -- and paying no attention to the erections that might last 4 hours or longer (as I'm a female, i didn't think this was pertinent), I think i am doing better.  Did you know, you can actually IGNORE the temptation to look at every one of the web sites about cats and dogs?  I found that out on Sunday. 

Talk to you all later.